Unpaid child support from deadbeat parents continues to swell
Unpaid child support is a huge financial problem for custodial parents, as well as the public purse which must supply assistance to children with little or no support and try to prosecute those failing to pay.
Unpaid child and spousal support in Ontario, for instance, now tops $2 billion, according to recent government data. That figure has grown by $500 million in the past three years alone, with some 135,000 support payment cases now in arrears.
A few years ago, Ontario's Family Responsibility Office (FRO), which enforces child-support payment collections, started a website designed to shame parents into paying up. But it's had limited success.That’s if they can find them, of course – which brings us to a rogue's gallery of the worst deadbeats the country has to offer, parents who haven't helped support their children for at least six months, pulling a vanishing act at the same time.
Each profile of a deadbeat – the vast majority of whom are men – features a name, photo, physical description, last known location and the person's usual occupation.
At the moment, Alberta and Ontario are alone in the publicizing of parents who won’t pay up but other provinces may soon be following their lead.
Critics, however, argue that dire circumstances and unfair rulings force many parents into arrears on child payments and that publicly shaming them does little to reconcile families or ensure compliance.
Clearly, some noncustodial parents who fall behind on child support simply can't afford to settle, either because they’re unemployed or on sick leave. But are the majority?
Do you think non-custodial parents often get a raw deal? Or does looking after your kids’ welfare come first, no matter what?
By Gordon Powers, MSN Money
Posted by: M | Sep 19, 2021 2:02:32 PM
My ex owes over $780,000 with FRO. Court ruling after court ruling... he has the ability to pay. The Final Orders lack enforcement. He has robbed my children, used every delay tactic, and especially in Durham Deadbeat Dad's get a pass. They turn to Bankruptcy and/or under and un-employ themselves. Their needs come first. While this amount owed he is still free to travel. FRO only enforces one 'hard' enforcement. His food, shelter, medical, dental all taken care of. Lifestyle remains the same. All assets- 2 homes, cottage, et al transferred to his parents. Judges state he 'judgment proofed himself'. How could he not having paid $500,000 in legal thru his business to lawyers and accountants. Now with over approx. $270,000 in COSTS ORDERS owed he still has a voice in court in Durham. Yes, the 'clean hands' doctrine does not exist. So he failed to pay equalization, backdated child, spousal and S7 expenses and still the Courts allow him to come back and wear down everyone... 12 years later. Yet I/we (the kids) have no money for legal advice. Trust me, in a child's life 12 yrs is huge. And I was chastised in Court this September re blood from stone. Please! Yet, deep pockets and connections is the name of the game in Family Court. I come without representation and without Court Ordered Legal Costs paid. Bottom Line: Family Court has failed miserably in Ontario and most of all it has failed our kids. 'For the Sake of the Children' is laughable! It is for the sake of the lawyers pockets, the business and professionals playing the system. Middle class and hard working Canadians do not fight paying their kids' support~ the rich do so. As well as bullies. That is what no one gets.
FRO can't handle the amount owed. When Judges fail to back up their own rulings...? For instance with $780,000 + owed my former spouse per court order was to spend 51 days in jail. No, the decision was in Durham a discretionary 20 days this Sept 16th for K O'Neill. Why?
The Judge basically told me to 'Settle' ~ trust me, every Court Order was in my favour. My kids are owed this money. Have been since 2001. Yet now we again go on a legal merry-go- round. The Family Court System is based on 'let's sling mud'. We can lie in our affidavit material, sworn testimony and by doing so gain an advantage. It simply is WRONG. The good people get crucified in Family Court and by our 'justice' system. All 'the system' does is hurt middle class Canadians.
And most of all our most valuable asset/resource.... our kids. It has to change.
Posted by: don | Sep 19, 2021 5:16:09 PM
For every bad parent there is also a good one. I have seen many a deadbeat dad and many a custodial parent who makes things up and lies to gain benefits. When there is so much emotion coming into play it is often hard to know where the truth lies. Custodial parents left to raise children with no support, non-custodial parents treated like wallets and second class parents. I have seen vey few instances where any of the parents act in the best interest of the child but that is the battle cry. What I have seen is a lot of failed relationships where the parents use children for their own egos and their own personal gain. Many a custodial parent who demand a higher standard of living for their children than the children would have gotten if the relationship had not broken. Non-custodial parents who refuse to support their children and play games while the child goes without.
Fingers can not be pointed using the male/female argument. There are as many harmful females as there are deadbeat males.
Posted by: Karla | Sep 20, 2021 2:29:14 AM
Maybe if the rules weren't so crazy then there wouldn't be so many deadbeats. My brother shares his kids half-time and works a full-time job. His ex-wife stays at home all day and receives enough money from my brother that she can afford the spa, vacations and a home as big as his. He actually turned down a promotion at work because it would have meant longer hours and he would have just been ordered to give all the extra money to his ex-wife. At least welfare recipients are supposed to look for work--her job is shopping and receiving manicures. Yes some men are losers but the rules are really stacked against hard-working people in favour of those who want a free ride. Why can't she at least try to get a job like the rest of us?
Posted by: Greg | Sep 20, 2021 6:34:21 AM
just dont get married or have kids ,just play
Posted by: Greg | Sep 20, 2021 6:35:44 AM
just dont get married or have kids its that simply just play the field
Posted by: Bruno | Sep 20, 2021 8:17:28 AM
I realy don`t know where to start,because this situations is all a jock.There are many man in Canada what are between a wall and a hard rock.Woman in general are the angels of Canada.Many man bin actualy set up by the woman,like i was.The ex had sex with a minor,and she also had many afairs during the 29 years of marrieg.But yes she got the two houses what i had,orderd by the judge,because i sad i would never support her.She never workt in her life,and because she hired 2 the best lawyers and becuase she is so charm,the judge fell for her loocks.So what in the world is this justice sistem working for????? for justice or womans or.......the justice sistem likes to sacrifice man for the divorce act???many woman are evil and they think this situation very well trough.If i had to support children anjustinly because the ex got the good look from the judge,i would actualy end my life,because this is a ungoing situation till in to the retirement.Please Goverment change this dem sistem.
Posted by: Bob | Sep 20, 2021 8:51:57 AM
Yup should not get married or have had kids.
She gets half the house and 1250$ month. I even earn less then her. She set me up and gets it all!
I just hope the kids know it was her who broke up the family when they get older.
Posted by: Faye | Sep 20, 2021 9:08:27 AM
Please do not confuse spousal support with child support. Two totally different subjects. Access also does not hinge on support paid or not. I can tell you a horror story that is well documented with FRO for a little over 2 years, I finally had to get my MPP involved because FRO was not doing anything useful or continued going back on their word. Long story short - the parent was gainfully employed for over 3 years with a car company - found a loop hole to become a contract worker (self employed) therefore FRO could not garnish wages as the parent now becomes the remitter. I had no help from OMVIC who licenses these people to work at a dealership, FRO was getting no where, told me to call back in 30 days and I did they had not picked up my file from the last call 30 days ago, never dealing with the same person so details get lost from one call to the next - I had no choice but to involve the MPP. It is amazing how far a parent will go not to pay $232 a month for child support because they can but will continue exercising their right to access. The whole system needs an overhaul - I for one certainly understand why and how FRO's debt in child support continues to grow - I say hand the system over to the bill collectors and watch how fast they find these parents and collect the money.
I see several parents in my own community that have found the self employed route so that the money cannot get deducted from their earnings. They drive while under suspension. It needs to be fixed.
Posted by: mike | Sep 20, 2021 9:41:45 AM
women should just get there tubes tied and they would not have these problems with men thats if there smart enough to do that .Kids cost to much too now a days so why have them.And when kids are born there given a death sentance any way and it is a long one
Posted by: Frank Lee | Sep 20, 2021 10:23:13 AM
I believe the laws will change and become fair in the future. Most of these laws were created at the behest of women's groups. And like most interest groups, their goal was to get more money handed to them. In the beginning 95% of all support handouts went from men to women. Today it is around 75%. Eventually it will be 50% and there will be as many women getting screwed as men. When that happens I predict the women's groups wil relax and a more sane set of laws will come in.
Posted by: Mr_Randell | Sep 20, 2021 10:26:11 AM
The law needs to change ! There is WAY to much emphasis put on the woman getting what they deserve ! There are so many cases of UNFAIR child support payments to WAY too many woman ! I have personally meet men who barly make $35,000 a year. Which is about $1000 every two weeks. That have to pay OVER half of there pay to there ex. Alot of the times the woman even make as much if not more then the man involved. And its so wrong and unfair ! How does the justice system expect the man to be able to support HIMSELF and life ? I fully understand EVERY man with children should pay child support. But the system is unfairly biased DRASTICALLY towards woman !! IT NEEDS TO CHANGE ! And be more fair for ALL partys involved.
Posted by: UBC Alum | Sep 20, 2021 10:30:43 AM
OMG this is too funny. My Mom and Sister have been asking me why I don't marry my girlfriend (who is amazing btw). They don't look at it from the guy's perspective. If I get married I have a 50/50 chance of getting divorced, losing half my assets and then paying decades of support payments. It's crazy. I'm amazed any men get married.
Posted by: justice | Sep 20, 2021 11:15:42 AM
THE BIGGEST PROBLEM WITH THE SYSTEM IS THAT THE FATHER WHO WORK'S HAS TO OUT BID THE GOVERMENT FOR THERE OWN CHILDREN! ISAY THE SYSTEM SHOULD BE PAY AS YOU GO, IF YOU DON`T MAKE MONEY TO KEEP YOUR CHILDREN THEN THE BEST INTREST OF THE CHILD IS THE ONE WHO WORK`S FOR THEM. STOP THE ABUSE`,STOP LIVING OFF YOUR CHILDREN WHAT A POOR EXAMPLE OF HUMANITE.
Posted by: Sheryl | Sep 20, 2021 11:41:02 AM
I'm on both sides of this one...I am currently owed over 70K back child support by my dead beat ex. I never brought emotions into the child relationship...but never lied to them about what was and wasn't paid. He drove, worked under the table, etc etc etc...I even offered to 1/2 his 'payable' amount if he were to become more active in the kids' life....he chose not to. It's now coming back on him...they are adults...and my children and I still managed to make a trip to Disneyland...even without his help. I just got busy and went back to school and worked my way into a decent job. Someone had to raise those kids, and he wasn't going to be involved either fiscally or emotionally. HIS loss...my gain. I'm happy to say I now have great adult kids...The other side...I have a new life partner. He is struggling with his ex wife. She's looking for back child support. They parted company when the youngest was 17 and already out of school and working. My partner still paid her every month until that child was 18. In addition, he continues to help his children on a regular basis, with school, giving them a leg up now and again. Helping them to become decent young adults...like any responsible parent should (regardless of gender). The youngest child still lives with my partner's ex and has been supplementing her income for 4 years......in addition to her job, and yet she's looking to my partner for spousal support. He isn't able to get through the court system in spite of 40K worth of legal fees, and 3 years...and nothing to fight over...and she's still looking for more. He has not been successful in getting a divorce, let alone closure in anything....and truthfully I struggle more with her wanting her 'blood' so to speak than I ever did with my ex's lack of payments....you tell me what's fair??? NEITHER is...there is NO balance in anything...the whole system totally bites in my estimation...and it bites because of the extremes on both sides....and the kids NEVER win!
Posted by: Ed | Sep 20, 2021 12:12:11 PM
I'm currently going through this, and I can tell you as a father who loves my daughter, that this system is completely unfair. My wife left, which is fine, but I pay all of the bills from the marriage. I cover the mortgage, car payment, insurance, etc..She has gone to live on welfare, in subsidized housing and is still asking for the full amounit in child support. I want to know what these women are thinking. Are the lazy, or just that ignorant. I will pay the child support as required until the point comes (and is fast approaching), when I either pay her, or eat. I am no good to my daughter starving and living in a box, which is exactly where my ex-wife wants me.
Fathers should join together, and get the law overturned, and a new law that actually makes sense put on the books.
Posted by: TRacey | Sep 20, 2021 12:15:33 PM
@ UBC Alum. What a cop-out!!! Using the law to justify your decision not to get married is such a joke. It is tough enough to meet decent men out there who aren't afraid of commitment now they're using divorce laws as a reason not to get married. What a joke! Why don't you just get a pre-nup?
Posted by: Karl | Sep 20, 2021 12:22:42 PM
Good for you Sheryl. It's good to see that rather than just play victim and chase your ex for money you took the honorable road and decided to provide for yourself and family. Those are good ethics and your adult children seem to have picked up on that. It's no wonder you have a good honorable man in your life now. If most women were like you then people like "UBC Alum" wouldn't be so afraid to get married.
Posted by: A girl | Sep 20, 2021 12:30:38 PM
Ugg. The comments here aren't right.
To the UBC Alum: The risk of divorce is 40/60 in Canada and the chance of divorce decreases after age 25. If you don't want to marry for fear of divorce that's your choice. If I don't want to skydive for fear of death, it's my choice. I really don't want to skydive. You really don't want to marry her. It's about risk.
To all the women haters: Child support is for the child - typically women do NOT use this on themselves, life is expensive for children & women are spending it on their kids.
The majority of deadbeats are men. In most cases, women are NOT the ones abandoning their children. It takes two to create a child, so if you create a child you are responsible - morally, ethically, and legally (even if it's hard to collect).
Posted by: Disappointed Mom | Sep 20, 2021 12:31:58 PM
I understand that there are great Dads and great Moms out there however most typically Mother's take the brunt of responsibility on after separation. I am deeply disappointed in our system-
I do not wish to rob my ex of all he earns however I do strongly believe that expenses should be shared. I want to be the Primary Care Giver for my son and can't continue to write legal letters to make the situation better or spend days off work and a fortune in court to gain what is owed for my child. In my case specifically my Ex has told me that it was my choice to be a single parent and therefore I am to suck it up. I am thankful for a flourishing career as some are not as lucky however that should not mean I still struggle to provide what both parents should. There is a lot of red tape and to me it looks like a big money making scam to get us through the system and tear families apart. In Quebec mediation is offered for free to families in advance of court proceedings avoiding all of the above. Many fathers push for more time when they are not capable or do not want it just to ensure they don't have to pay up. It's extremely sad, I'm lost in a system that won't help. My heart go out to all the amazing parents that put their children first like I do~
Posted by: Phil O. Sopher | Sep 20, 2021 1:31:49 PM
I have a question to ask. Suppose a woman tells her husband (or bf) that she has birth control but doesn't. She secretly wants to get pregnant even though she knows he doesn't want kids...and so she gets pregnant. He wants her to get an abortion but she doesn't. In effect she misled him into impregnating her. If they split up should he have a moral or legal obligation to pay for that child?
Posted by: UBC Alum | Sep 20, 2021 1:42:14 PM
Sheryl you seem like a good person but hearing that you are owed 70k in support payments is freaking scary. I don't know how long that is for or how much he actually did pay but you said that he did pay some and still owes $70k. If you're an average man making $45k per year and paying taxes then it might take something like 1/2 your paycheque to pay in support. And then you might only get to see your kids on weekends...I have friends who are going through this and they all say the same thing. Don't marry a woman unless she makes as much money as you do. My girlfriend is awesome and I'm happy to support her as long as we're together but if our relationship were ever to end so should the money. They should make the law so that each parent has the kids 50% of the time but each adult has to pay their own way without being subsidized by the other parent. This country has too many people looking to get money from other people.
Posted by: Missiz Luv | Sep 20, 2021 2:09:35 PM
It goes both ways. Sometimes you get a vindictive ex that uses the child as a paycheque and leverage. My husband's ex has us paying out 1/4 of his monthly net income, all because it was based on 10% of his gross annual. Well, he also has a lot of deductions that come off the pay and a lot of tax withheld. His daughter is very spoiled. I received quite a bit less from my ex and he didn't pay for 9 years so when he was caught, he owed arrears as well as ongoing. Unfortunately, because my husband's kid gets so much, most months, I would have to pay his support with my daughter's. My own daughter has had to do without extras, while his gets trips to England, weekends in Toronto, the newest cellphones, ipod(s), etc. My daughter has had to get second hand items, while his is spoiled. Equality? What a joke.
Posted by: Missiz Luv | Sep 20, 2021 2:14:30 PM
oh and for you, Phil O. Sopher, yes, you are stuck. That's what happened to my husband. They discussed not having children, she agreed... then one unlucky night, he had a "mistake" and then a child. She was happy because his family has money and they spend it very freely on the child. She uses the kid as leverage, ALWAYS. Be careful because you can't undo the child. Yes, he cares for the kid, but he wishes it turned out differently, in a good relationship with a faithful spouse instead of that creature.
Posted by: Ex-Canadian sick of the limited vision of child support | Sep 20, 2021 3:02:33 PM
Mr Powers, I'd love to have the opportunity to be able to send you an in-depth e-mail explaining my situation and why I personally choose to leave my country of birth to make a life else where, somewhere that I would not be pigeon-holed into debt, depression and have my children unable to exercise their right to visitation with me (this is after all the way that the law states it!), however, I am anticipating that you will do as every other journalist and politician has done up until now, and you will simple ignore what I write.
Explain to me why it is fair that a court be able to make a ruling, without any real possibility of appeal, which forces one parent to foot all of the financial burden of a split family? If the "custodial parent" cannot afford to have the responsibility of the children, and are unwilling to do what is necessary to support their share of the family finances (a question of simply getting a job for a couple of years before going back to university), should they really be the "custodial parent"? Is it correct to penalize the other parent, forcing them to pay for all family debt, pay over 50% of their income in support payments (half child, half spousal for a woman whom he never married), their "share" of any extra expenses, and a lawyer? What about this parents constitutional right to be able to live an independent life? And in addition to that, refuse the normally granted subtraction travel expenses to exercise visitation of children in a geographically different region that the "non-custodial" parent.
Since I made my choice, I've tried to get in touch why the mother of my children, yet she refuses any contact, and has also refused delivery of parcels for the children. I simple wish to have a relationship with my children in whatever form I may, and to resume reasonable child support payments in accordance with my current situation, yet this is seemingly impossible to do. I also refuse to allow myself to be put in the same situation that I was in before leaving, otherwise there was absolutely no reason for me to have left.
Anyways, if you do actually read this comments and are inclined to correspond further on my own situation, I would be astonished and more that open to it.
An ex-Canadian sick of the limited vision of child support.
Posted by: Pissed off father, fighting for shared custody. | Sep 20, 2021 3:38:25 PM
The majority of this is rediculous. My wife choose to leave, I didnt' force her out. I am fighting in court to get as much time as I possible can with my daughter, and all I get from her side is more and more child support. The fact is, that if either parent chooses to leave, and ultimately fights to see their child, they should be able to support that child. Maybe men are more often to blame for not paying child support, but more often than not it is the women who seem to have forgotten that they fought and fought for "women's rights", and equal pay and all that crap.
A girl - you are an idiot. Parents, mainly fathers, want to have a relationship with their kids, and more often than not it is the woman that stands in the way. I agree that both have a resonsibility to take care of their children, but with father's getting screwed every which way from Sunday, it is no wonder that they try and "cheat" the system.
The guidelines for child support are so far out of wack. The system needs an overhaul, and until that happens, we will continue to see more and more fathers cheat and lie their way through support payments.
End this sense of entitlement. I work hard, worked harder to get where I am, and will be damned if I'm gonna let a woman who choose her circumstance take it away.
Posted by: Anonymous | Sep 20, 2021 4:03:41 PM
Child support is RARELY used for anything regarding the child. I've seen it a million times. One parent is made to be bankrupt trying to pay the ridiculous amounts, while the other one receiving it spends the money on items for themselves.
They need to do away with all child and spousal support. Its a ridiculous concept. Children and ex's are not property, and should not be treated as such. Forcing someone to do something never benefits anyone, and only sours the whole situation.
My parents divorced when I was young and I ended up living with my mom, and I saw my dad just get beat into the ground trying to pay the support. My mom just splurged and wasted the money on nothing, while I needed real things. My dad found it hard to even be around us because it just made things worse (because he couldnt stand seeing my mom). Only later when I grew up did we actually get to hang out more, when I could drive myself, and my mom didnt interfere.
Posted by: Dad's get the shaft | Sep 20, 2021 4:11:13 PM
This really bothers me...I have 50% shared custody, which I understand is better than a lot of dads get. My ex cheated with her boss then left for the greener pasture that wasn't. So with a 50-50 share, I pay her monthly child support because I make more, which is the only part of this I'm okay with. I have never missed or been late on a payment. BUT, as soon as you pay a dime in child support you are no longer able to claim the child as a dependent, so she gets the benefit of that fat tax return every year...I get nothing. Included in that, she claims all the sports fees, etc. that I am paying 68% of in the first place. Now, she's pregnant with her new boyfriend and my child support is about to double because of her loss of income while on mat leave. WTF??!!? When my new partner went on mat leave with our latest child, I didn't get the benefit of a reduced child support....why the hell should I be supplementing their income, while still getting my daughter 50% of the time and not being able to claim her as my dependent? She still gets fed, clothed and sheltered equally at my house as with her mother. Now I'll bascially be supplementing their new baby, too. Must be nice.
Posted by: Ed | Sep 20, 2021 4:12:04 PM
Anonymous - Excellent insight. Thank you for speaking the truth, as hard as it might be for some to hear.
I would like to add, that unless there is an actual situation of abuse, custody should always be 50/50. Children (not parents), deserve to have both parents actively involved in their life.
Posted by: Frank Lee | Sep 20, 2021 8:38:28 PM
I believe the laws will change and become fair in the future. Most of these laws were created at the behest of women's groups. And like most interest groups, their goal was to get more money handed to them. In the beginning 95% of all support handouts went from men to women. Today it is around 75%. Eventually it will be 50% and there will be as many women getting screwed as men. When that happens I predict the women's groups wil relax and a more sane set of laws will come in.
Posted by: jean | Sep 20, 2021 11:47:04 PM
with me i did not ask anything from him i took on the children to raise myself as they are one all girls young and he really did not want to have to raise them at all ,. he still owes money for his children .he should at least have to pay for them .H will not help find it I think it was taken by fraud .one question would answer that that would be was it deposited into any bank . under my name fake person not me . i had it come by cheque . no orders from me to deposite . they will not tell me . at all.