What's the most outrageous thing you've been asked to do at work?

Many years ago: "Go back to washing dishes after those toilets are clean."

Many years ago, while working at Intermedia International in Winnipeg, I was asked to buy milk for the moronic boss named Al Carruthers and his protégée Jim Farrell, two parasites that did nothing in the office.
I hope they burn in hell.

I was asked to claim all shipments 10% short and add it back into inventory after the claim was paid.
When I refused he asked what I would do if my job depended on it........I did not but my work life got so miserable I left a couple of months later.

Several things really... sigh...
My boss' wife got a speeding ticket, and alas did not HAVE a driver's license and was to report to the police station within 24 hours. MY task... was to FORGE a Driver's License for her to produce to the police. On another occasion his sons needed hats made for an event taking place at school the next morning (my task handed to be at 5pm and told to be on his desk by 7am the following morning). I had to MAKE Easter Bonnet hats from scratch for the event!!! But I think the Zinger of it all.. was when I had to go to the pharmacy and get some Viagara for him (no prescription obviously.. that would have been toooo easy). BTW.. I resigned the position about 8 weeks after all of this started happening.

i worked in a pizza restaurant and we were having a company inspection so my boss handed me a toothbrush to scrub the floor and wall with , and for this i got employee of the month unreal eh this was over 25 years ago and i still remember the feeling of doing this

I was asked to explain to a new employee from Europe to not stand on the toilet seat when using the washroom. Language was obviously a barrier. I left the firm very shortly after.

I was a book keeper and tax preparer at an accounting firm and my boss asked me to take a bucket of water and dump it in the toilet when it wouldn't flush after she had a BM!! No joke! The list goes on but that one really stands out.

My boss asked me to clip a hangnail for him. Needless to say I didn't do it.

Couple of years ago, i was asked to work a double shift (each shift is 12 hrs) while working in Diamond Drilling in Yukon. I accepted. 24 hours of diamond drilling is something I cannot put into words. But hey, everybody there does it if asked. It's no big deal.

When I was 22 years old I had a boss who called me into his office and told me that I wasn't selling enough. His remedy? He ordered me to unbutton my blouse by another button and wear shorter skirts (my skirts were already well above the knee!). He was serious - this was logical to him - he didn't see it as either inappropriate or harrassment.... as evidenced by his grovelling the following day when he called me in to his office again to say that his WIFE had advised him that he should recind his order lest I decided to SUE him.... The guy couldn't see why this would cause a problem, but said his wife had been quite insistent.... Uh, DUHHH!!!!!

Same Boss Part Two - I had to travel on business with the creep. We had a client who was KNOWN to not like to keep his hands to himself. This boss would intentionally put me in close physical proximity to the letch, who would then drape himself all over me, and grope me during meetings. I understood that local customs were different ,that women were viewed as objects, that by local standards this wasn't out-of-line, and that if you are going to do business in a foreign country, you have to understand that you are not in the west. Although uncomfortable, I didn't freak out. However, the boss would gabble with this client in the native language (which I didn't speak) and they would both look at me, smile and laugh. One night we were out entertaining a group of clients. I stood up to dance with an old man who asked me. I could hear heated voices at our large table, which suddenly erupted into a fist fight between clients. When I asked one of the English speaking clients (a woman) what had happened, she explained that MY BOSS HAD PROMISED ME TO THE LETCH FOR THE EVENING AND HE HAD THOUGHT THAT I WAS GOING HOME WITH HIM - WHEN I STOOD UP TO DANCE HE'D CALLED ME A WHORE BECAUSE I WAS DANCING WITH ANOTHER MAN - THE OTHER GENTLEMAN WAS FIGHTING HIM FOR MY HONOUR!!! Can you imagine working for a man who would stoop that low? I was a salesperson, not an ESCORT! Needless to say, I was relieved when this boss finally moved on, but I've never forgotten what a complete DICKHEAD you were Colin! Hope you finally got slapped with the massive sexual harrassment suit that you so roundly deserved!

I am impressed with the level of hate for management in this thread. Fine by me, the only thing worse than organized labour is working for The Man.

I recall cleaning out the toilet for a boss who had IBS. He'd go out of his way to eat MSG on my shift. Later, he wanted me to change the batteries on the microphones he'd planted throughout the shop to listen in on the workers. Was he being a dolt for pointing out his secret surveillance microphones, or was he sly for letting me know he knew I knew about the mikes in the first place? I never stuck around long enough to find out. Good times, good times.

My boss told me save all my used earplugs and to throw them in the pocket of my jeans when I did a wash he said they come out "good as new" so for the whole week I saved them, then on the Friday I went up to his office put the handful on his desk and said " here you go when you get home put these in your jeans pocket and then you can wash and wear them" he never said that to me again

The plant I managed successfully unionized and the owner became obsessed with firing those who spearheaded the union drive. He told me to make up work violations and start a paper trail to justify their dismissal. He even went so far as to suggest that I go outside and butt out a cigarette next to these people and write them up for smoking inside the yard perimeter. I refused to comply and was fired.

My boss asked me to write my own obituary and be prepared to share it with strangers in a meeting the next day. " What do you want people to remember you by". I worked in a customer service/business opportunity environment. I left the next week...

This is too rich, that there really are that many buttheads out there in management positions. So all you managers reading these complaints, wake up and do yourself a favour. Quit making such a BIG fool of yourself. I have quit many job because of Dorks like you. How cost effective is this?
I was a Welder for a fencing company. one day I was asked to shovel up behind his GUARD Dog's, (as if someone would break in to steel fencing). DHHH At the end of that week I had a new job down the street that came with a $9 dollar rase.

I had worked at a place for 5 years, steadily building up my sales, selling computers. The boss sold the business to these scumbags who had a plan to replace every employee with buddies of theirs. They reduced our earnings by 30%, they had already fired the head technician. I had confirmed a good sale, decent profit margins. My boss told me I should have charged labour to upgrade the memory .. even though we had never charged it before and the sale was confirmed based on the quote I was already committed to. I refused, handed the phone to my boss and told her to make that call, and thereby probably lose the sale. She fired me on the spot.