More young adults living with parents now than in past 20 years
51 per cent of Generation Ys between the ages of 20 and 29 lived with their parents last year, according to the latest Statistics Canada data.
That’s compared with just 31 per cent of Generation Xers and 28 per cent of late boomers who lived at home during that same age period.
And while it may be easy to view them all as permanent 'basement dwellers', Generation Y is just more financially savvy than past generations, says CIBC economist Benjamin Tal.
The gang in this cohort simply know when they've got a good thing going.
The comparative lifestyle figures, including those on delaying marriage and children, simply reflect how thoughtful Generation Y members actually are, Tal says. Most, who he describes as "frighteningly calculating" are just biding their time until they’re financially secure enough to support those spouses and children.
Barbara Mitchell, author of The Boomerang Age: Transitions to Adulthood in Families agrees.
A lot of young people could likely afford to live on their own, but not in the manner they're accustomed to, she maintains. Their numbers are also being swelled by the increasing levels of student debt they've accumulated by the time they finish their studies.
Despite this, both parties are generally happy with this extended living arrangement even though it may increase the frequency of arguments between parents and children over subjects such as money, chores and responsibilities, she admits.
Still stuck with a mortgage and a house full of 20-somethings? How are things working out?
By Gordon Powers, MSN Money
Posted by: Hells_partsman | Sep 14, 2021 1:53:09 PM
This all comes down to the old saying "you reap what you sow" . Parents that give their children everything are not teaching them anything, it only makes them more dependant. Children (in this case the 20 and 30 somethings) need to learn the value of self respect and that is a lesson that you can't learn without the pain of living on your own. To understand this concept think about that person you know of that was given everything that you had to work for; now think of a person that built an empire from nothing (warren buffet vs. paris hilton), who do you respect more. now these are the extremes but paris hilton still lives at home and warren buffet when the time was right not convenient.
If you want your kids out, charge them rent, and treat them like hired help. Sure they will be mad in the moment but if you tought them right they'll respect you for the rest of your life and beyond for the lesson. If you had babied them for their whole life; well you reap what you sow.
Posted by: Rose | Sep 14, 2021 1:53:39 PM
I think that "living at home" should be interpreted with caution. I have not been living with my parents since leaving to attending university at age 18. However, my permanent address for the first several years was their address, as I moved (every semester) between university residences, student/temporary apartments, etc. This likely skews the results, especially for those in their younger 20s!
Posted by: Fran | Sep 14, 2021 2:04:21 PM
I tried it with my youngest son and his girlfriend. No thanks. After his girlfriend threatened to hit me and I suppose to pay for everything but be the boarder, I kicked them out.
Posted by: Trixie | Sep 14, 2021 2:05:21 PM
Thanks Mike for the update...and no, I wasn't working in the era you speak of.
I do know my own mother was, in my words, very lucky in her life and I could not figure out how she did it. You may have answered that question for me.
To Rose, above me now, I think this discussion could be focusing on the "young" people who live at home and spend, spend, spend. If you are living at home, not overspending, going to college, but working towards a goal, good for you.
This is it for me. Have a good one.
Posted by: ValB | Sep 14, 2021 2:13:29 PM
I completely agree with Rachel11. I don't see any shame in living with parents. As long as every family member is happy - this is no one else business.
Yes some people were able to make it after they moved out on their own, but hove many did not? Had to quit school because to study what they wanted and do the job they landed to pay expenses was not possible. In some cases that would be their own fault, but in many cases they just did not get a lucky break other people got.
Now from other end: how many 'empty nested' adults got depression and feel lonely, left behind?
Again it heavily depends on each person personality. Ironically the more parents have built their lives around their children, the more they suffer. The transition from busy parent to an empty nested adult is not easy especially when children are a way too busy (working and studying and having live of their own) to give some attention to their parents. While living at home gives opportunity for a quick conversation, information update or helping to move a piece of furniture while not interrupting normal life flow. If a child doesn't live with parents any help or conversation requires phone time or traveling across a city and becomes a bug in child's life as well as makes parents feel bad by annoying busy child. And that not talking about elderly people, whom Rachel11 was talking about, who need some help constantly.
So my mantra is - as long as everyone in a household is happy - the arrangements must be good.
Posted by: O. D. | Sep 14, 2021 3:02:36 PM
I live in rural Saskatchewan. When we moved here 4 years ago we bought a house for $23,000. The same type of house now sells for over $79,000. A lot of old houses suddenly tripled or quadrupled in value. My friend lives in the city, she rents a tiny basement apartment for $700/month. Buying a new house is just not going to happen for her. I think that times are totally different now. Everything seems so expensive - utilities, gas, food etc. God forbid you have a small child...a pair of winter boots for a baby is FIFTY dollars unless you want to shop at Value Village. I could go on with my rant, but what is the point.
Posted by: Alyssa | Sep 14, 2021 4:32:15 PM
I am a 22 year old who is living at home. I moved out at 19 and lived on my own, until I found myself in too much debt (probably a familiar story to a lot of people). I realized I was in a bad situation, and took steps to remedy it. I found a high-paying job at our local university, and moved back home to pay off what I owe so I can go back to school. I'm not treated as a child while I'm living there, I help out with laundry, dishes, cleaning the house, etc. And my parents have different expectations of me because I know how to survive outside "the nest".
My boyfriend is 31 and also lives at home. He does his own cooking, his own laundry, he cleans his section of the house. His parents are getting on in years and he is therefore helping out with home repairs, pays some of their bills, and also pays them rent. His time at home has allowed him to own a newer vehicle, save a down payment for a house (which we will be looking at purchasing next year), and put himself through university.
I look at a lot of the people I went to high school with, who haven't gone to post-secondary at all, are still working in retail/fast food restaurants/gas stations, or not working at all, and believe that I am in a much better place than they are. I have goals and a path to get to those goals.
Does that still put me in the "Get those kids out of the house!" scenario?
Posted by: Jordyn | Sep 14, 2021 7:25:10 PM
I am just shy of 27 and last year purchased a two bedroom condo with my bf. I was lucky enough to have my parents help me with my university tuition and major expenses but I also worked two part-time jobs in order to pay for my own books, cell phone, and entertainment. I graduated on time and was again, lucky enough to land a one year contract with a higher than average salary for the average university graduate. I did live at home (becuase I did not know where my next move was after the contract and did not want to bother moving in and out of places after having to move every year), but I also gave my parents rent and paid for all my own expenses. After my contract, I found a permanent job that paid less than my contract job but I took it as "you have to start somewhere". I decided to move out to be closer to work as my hours were crazy and I would be an hour commute away by public transportation and couldn't risk a kink in the schedule and be late for meetings (or spend an hour+ in traffic and have to pay for parking and gas and still run that risk).I moved downtown where rent was high and my budget was tight but I still gave my parents "rent" - they had done so much for me, it was the least I could do.
I find that with kids/adults from my generation, there are a lot of factors as to why they're sticking to living with their parents.
1. They ARE irresponsible - I've seen it many times. They drag out thier time in university, rack up their student loans on socializing, or some come out with immense amounts of debt.
2. Parents coddle them - I know, my parents helped me out, but they also instilled in me that I needed to independent, responsible, and appreciative. They didn't ask me get a parttime job, let alone 2, but I did and had I pissed away their generous help and prolonged my studies and was irresponsible, they would have cut me off.
3. They can't find jobs - they aren't all to blame. Many just simply can't get a job. I've been through it myself, applying for endless jobs after graduating and didnt' get a single interview (which is why I had to leave Toronto and take the contract). It's hard out there and the recent recession isn't making things better as a lot of older generations need to continue to work and jobs are limited.
4. Student loans - I'm lucky, I don't have any and I commend anyone who is trying to pay them off.
(Not the ones that pissed it away though, that's your own fault)
5. Housing prices - they are ridiculous, that is all I have to say. The only reason we purchased a home was becuase it was cheaper than paying rent, BUT that meant we moved an hour commute away. At least i'm near a skytrain now so it's not so bad as having to connect to buses, etc. We put the minimum needed for the first time homebuyer (I actually put the whole downpayment myself) and we live a tight budget but at least it's our own and we're not paying someone else's mortgage - it may not be possible for everyone but maybe everyone is looking for the 'idea' home and not where they can afford?
I don't see it as anything wrong with living at home but I hope it's a relationship of give and take and not just parents doing their 'duty' and kids taking advantage of it.
Posted by: Northern Ontario | Sep 14, 2021 8:57:26 PM
Financially speaking, if you do the math of basic costs of living in an apartment, the average person would have to earn a gross income of 60 000 to cover rent - $1000 / utilities - $150 / cable & internet- $100/ food - $500 /car insurance - $150 /car payment - $450 /gasoline - $300 / little spending money- $400 / student debt - $400. Never mind trying to save for a down payment on a house unless you are 2 people working.
I suppose some of you might say things like - well looks like an extravagant lifestyle or some of the above expenses seem low or high.
All I am trying to get across is that living nowadays is very expensive indeed. I will not hesitate to allow my children to stay at home in order to help out. However, because I know the burden of living expenses for those graduating from school and starting on their own, it is my responsibility as a parent to make sacrifices now so that I am able to assist my children by paying as much as possible for their post-secondary schooling. Putting aside money now will allow them to be on their own much faster and give them the independence they deserve. They should not have to be strapped paying off their school 7-10 years after they graduate.
Posted by: Lindsey | Sep 14, 2021 9:26:54 PM
Rachel11, thank you for your comments as they reflected some of my thoughts on this issue. In a Western culture of hyper-individualistic ideals, we seem to have completely forgotten what it means to be in community with others, including family. I am not saying there is not a problem with the current generation, their strong tendency toward "entitlement attitudes" because there most certainly IS a problem here that needs dramatic correction and "tough love." However, what about those few responsible adults in their 20s and 30s who have strong relationships with their families and choose to remain at home for mutually beneficial reasons (obviously, unmarried)? There doesn't seem to be a place for such scenarios in Western culture where individualism rules. In most other cultures, children remain at home until married (usually for economic reasons, but also because family and community are highly valued). I spent a year living in such a culture. I choose to value and live in community because it challenges my tendencies toward selfishness, and I'm overall healthier for placing myself in such an arrangement. I would be careful to make a distinction between those with entitlement attitudes who truly need to "grow up" and those few responsible adults who choose to live within a family structure for mutually beneficial reasons. There ARE other ways of thinking about this issue. Responsible adults who value community AND family should not be lumped in with others who disrespect and dishonour (ie. take advantage of) family by maintaining "entitlement" attitudes. Just some thoughts "outside-the-box" and outside of the typical Western mindset.
Posted by: Jessica | Sep 14, 2021 10:36:18 PM
I have to say that even though its financially tougher these days to start out on your own....it still needs to happen in a timely manner. I'm 35 and moved out of my parents home when I was 18 at their insistence....it was the best thing my mother ever did for me :) I own my home, my car, my recreational toys....all of it. You don't learn to budget and save and prioritize if your parents are footing the bill. I just met a female apprentice at my work that makes very good money at 20.....and still lives at home partying it up cause her parents don't charge her rent even! She's an apprentice, not a university student. I gave her heck in a friendly manner. Maybe it's harsh, but my philosophy is if you're told to sink or swim....you'll swim.
Posted by: Dana | Sep 15, 2021 3:46:45 PM
I am 22 and I have lived on my own since I was 17. I think my views, responsibilities and independance are very different from most people my age; however, I have met a surprising number of peers that are in the same boat as me. I have no assistance from my parenst. I work 2 to 3 different jobs depending on the time of year, and attend university full time. Some semesters I could only afford 3 courses, other times I can do 4 or 5. This semester I'm doing 6 to try and catch up for lost time.
I took a look at my tax returns to see how much I earned, and reflect on all of the things I have done. It turns out, that for the last three years I have earned $20,000. One of my jobs is serving and I earn tips which I do not claim the full amount for, so I have probably earned an additional $4,000.
I don't feel that I "suffer" financially by any means. I have observed that we live in an incredibly consumeristic society. Is it possible that things have not become extremely expensive...but that we just consume, consume, consume - often beyond our means.
Kids must be raised not only to be able to support themselves, but also to have the abillity to find happiness in all situations. Money is not what sets you up for life. You need it to take care of your basic needs, absolutely, but there is so much more to life than getting your education, living in a nice house, and having a nice car. I think that parents allowing their kids to live with them until they are able to achieve those things only reinforces that ideology. It was said earlier that these adults are living at home because they can't live the lifestyle they want living on their own....the only thing that tells me is that they have been spoiled.
In conclusion, it claims 50% of gen y'ers live at home. That means the other half is working really really hard. And the other 50% that are living at home....well, some of them might be free riding, but of course, many of them aren't.
Posted by: Kris | Sep 15, 2021 6:53:07 PM
If it's mutually beneficial (as in the case of the younger generation taking care of their parents and/or grandparents, if that's desirable to them or a sacrifice they wish to make--depends on how you look at it, or if it eases parents' worries to help their children through those last years of post-secondary school), I see nothing wrong with adult children continuing to live with their parents.
I'm 29 and still living at home. I pay the water bill and my third of the house taxes all year round, plus occasionally the heating and electricity. Buy my own food/cook my own meals, save for the odd Sunday dinner when extended family is invited (eat healthier than my folks/sometimes eat organic and you kinda get sick of eating the same stuff you ate in your childhood, so it makes sense to do your own thing, y'know. Prefer having control of groceries and almost everything else I buy/need, have since I was 19. Don't agree with subsisting on Kraft Dinner or Ramen Noodles--unless you HAVE to, as with the above poster who said she moved out at 16--that's a bit of an extreme of the "living lean" mentality and the goal of being independent & moving out shouldn't come at the expense of your health). Used to pay the cable bill and internet (back when I used those the most), but then my father wanted to add a lot more to the cable bill--including premium channels like TMN/HBO and a PVR--my mother bundled the internet with the cable & her cell phone, and my use of TV and internet went way down just due to getting outside and out socially more, plus reading more books & finding other interests, so it didn't make sense to pay for that stuff anymore (efforts to get 'em to cancel cable to save money and simply rely on a computer hooked up to the TV and using internet for news, shows, and films--no luck).
I take care of their pets (two cats and a dog) when they go on vacation (no family or friends close by to look after 'em--at least, none that're good with or even really like animals), so that saves them from having to kennel them. And they go on a LOT of vacations (my parents were way ahead of me at 29 year of age than I am currently, but they rack up that line of credit like crazy in order to fit in all the things they hope to do before they're too old to do it all. Not sure if this is the right way to go--live life to its fullest and, if you die with a ton of debt, oh well--or financially reckless, but they're enjoying themselves and I'm not about to emulate them, so I guess it's all good).
I'd like my own space eventually (I don't think owning is essential though--money that would've gone toward a house or condo could go to a diversity of investments instead), but it doesn't make sense to leave yet because I haven't got a solid career path figured out yet. I work full time at a dependable fall-back job, but otherwise I've been all over the map (have tried something new job-wise about once every two to three years...a couple of those attempts were genuine tries at a career/field, but I change my mind or get bored mighty quickly so far). Currently checking out various programs in order to head back to school, looks like the smartest decision at the moment. I would probably not be able to do this (at least not until later in life) if I had made myself arbitrarily move out years ago simply to have my own space and/or create some false perceived impression by society at large of having "grown up". Who gives a $#!t what everyone thinks of you (and given that it's now 51% of up-to-29-year-olds living at home, you're in a majority anyway--though I won't be covered by that when I hit 30 next year, heh).
Remember that the only one you really need to impress is yourself. You're not in a race with all the other 20-somethings, even though it might feel that way. Go after what you want, explore, succeed, and do whatever you need to do to make yourself happy, but don't feel pressured into deciding before you're ready to make the leap (at the same time, don't procrastinate too much and get stuck--easy trap to fall into).
Posted by: Dreamfilm Productions | Sep 20, 2021 8:32:44 AM
We have just finished a documentary about this very topic, from the perspective of families with adult children living with this 'back at home' or 'never left' situation - we explore the pros and the cons for all involved and touch on many of the points you've all raised. It airs Nov 10 on CBC, and you can check it out at our website http://dreamfilm.ca/film/generation-boomerang/