Airline tells you to use bathroom before boarding
You have to admit, airlines are pretty creative when they want to screw you.
What kind of monster travels with two bags? Ding! That’ll be 30 bucks. Oh, you want to change your flight ‘cause your grandma’s sick? Bang! 75 bucks. We’re sorry, it’s not our fault you’re a fat pig. You’ll need an extra seat. Whack! Double your fare.
But for all of the airline industry’s inventive penny-pinching, the latest might be my favourite.
Japan’s All Nippon Airways (ANA) is apparently trying out a new initiative where airline staff will encourage passengers to use the bathroom before boarding the plane.
According to the Daily Mail, flight attendants will now stand by the airline’s boarding gate and ask each flier to “relieve themselves” in an apparent bid to cut down on carbon emissions (read: our profit margins on fuel aren’t big enough).
“ANA hopes the weight saved will lead to a five-tonne reduction in carbon emissions over the course of 30 days,” writes the newspaper.
While there’s no word on whether airline staff will actually stand next to passengers steroid-testing-style to make sure they pee (smell test anybody?), what’s sure is the policy was put in place at the start of October and could extend into a full-time procedure.
In case you’re wondering, the science has been done for us. The Daily Mail estimates, based on an average human bladder capacity, 150 passengers using the bathroom on an airplane would lead to an extra 63.7 kg of waste.
Is that worth an airline telling you to drain the tubes before getting on board? Well, you tell us.
By Jason Buckland, MSN Money
Posted by: Rose | Oct 9, 2021 1:21:08 AM
This is just getting silly. What is our world coming to now???
Posted by: Hemingway Forbes | Oct 9, 2021 9:02:54 AM
Super. Now if Airlines can just get all men to shave prior to boarding, and women to remove make-up there would be some further weight saving for sure - you think? (lololololo) Come to think of it why not just fly naked.
Posted by: L | Oct 9, 2021 9:28:25 AM
Yes, flying naked sounds good to me. lol Maybe I could turn my flying experience into more fun than I anticipated. lol O.K. Enough of the sarcasm. This is just plain ridiculous.
Posted by: Dean | Oct 9, 2021 9:31:39 AM
I do this anyway. Not to save the airline a little extra weight, but to eliminate my need to use the cramped washroom on my flights.
Posted by: craig pettipas | Oct 9, 2021 9:33:11 AM
great that will free up the rest rooms for the mile high club
Posted by: wreckbeach69 | Oct 9, 2021 10:05:36 AM
there are already charters that serve nudists,not a sexual thing kiddies.hilarious comments,readers r on a roll
Posted by: Mak | Oct 9, 2021 10:13:03 AM
As if we dont pay enought that we should be able to go bathroom as many times as we want...
Posted by: john | Oct 9, 2021 10:20:46 AM
Boy, this really p*#%#es me off!
Posted by: Laura | Oct 9, 2021 11:02:25 AM
I know, why don't you just start strapping diapers and a parachute on passengers, then you can save money by just dropping passengers over their destination, while they relieve themselves on the descent downward. This will save extra money and waste.........
Posted by: Paulito | Oct 9, 2021 11:30:50 AM
I say screw em' - I'd look them right in the face and say 'for the price I'm paying, I'll be relieving myself on the plane - and frankly, it's none of your business so shut your cakehole!'
Posted by: luce | Oct 9, 2021 11:45:52 AM
yeah ...what if a little kids piss absorbs through his pants all the way to the seat..
clean it? but then it will smell and people wont pay to travel through your plane.Luv
Posted by: yeah... | Oct 9, 2021 11:56:03 AM
WTF are u talkin about luce??...
Posted by: Ed | Oct 9, 2021 12:04:46 PM
Well if we have to pee to loose weight what about our bowels. Do we have to clear them too.
This stinks!
Posted by: okaythen | Oct 9, 2021 12:31:23 PM
Luce, are you a member of engrish.com? :)
Posted by: Mike | Oct 9, 2021 12:35:55 PM
LOL. They might as well start making bladder awareness posters so people go to the washroom before driving. Because we know millions of people drive and I bet its harder on the cars when the driver is full of waste...
Posted by: Air Canada Sucks | Oct 9, 2021 12:53:46 PM
I'll look at this the other way when I was on an Aircanada Flight a short less than 1hr flight the fasten seatbelt sign came on while I was in the bathroom having major bowel explosions when the 2 French Canadian stewardest start knocking on my door non-stop that I have to get out as the plane was landing. What a b$&@* ! How are we supposed to know when the plain is landing if the pilot does not indicate we are preparing for landing, when I came out I got the worst stink eye from both stewardesses trying to embarrass me, but it did not work, I was told they had reported me to the Pilot for being disobedient, I told her to do whatever she wants, when nature calls I don't care if we are landing 1000miles an hour, the pilot was nice enough to laugh it off and said its for your safety, I said that's fine but they treated me like a criminal and I had to go you know, can't just come out with shit on my pants and my pants around my knees, although I am a beautiful girl I don't think that would have been very pleasant for anyone to see or for me to endure, never been talked to so rudely on a flight ever over something I had no control over. I am hoping Air Canada goes bankrupt, and PS lately their flights are appearing to be really old and look like they are going to fall apart, if you love yourself and your family pay a little more and fly with another airline where you know they don't have financial issues like Air Canada and can afford to spend money on making their planes safe and comfortable. I love my life and family, go suck an Egg Air Canada.
Posted by: Brian | Oct 9, 2021 12:57:10 PM
Maybe they can team up with the people at security. Last time thru there I had to remove my belt and my pants nearly hit the floor. Since I'm already undressed, maybe I can pee in the wastecan for them
Posted by: Chris | Oct 9, 2021 1:07:04 PM
It would be ridiculous to ask people to wear no clothes, but maybe ditch the undies before you board...clean all the lint our of your navel, blow your nose, lose the ear wax, exfoliate, maybe get a Brazilian if you've got time, wear sandals not shoes or boots, don't eat or drink 24 hours before boarding...we can really help these poor starving airline businesses out if we put our heads together.
Posted by: peony99 | Oct 9, 2021 1:09:15 PM
Uh .. AirCanadasucks - I think the focus today is on Japan Airways (ANA) - But I'm sure you feel better having ranted RE: Air Canada. Personally I only travel Air Canada - only airline where I feel totally safe. Oops, now I'm beginning to sound like you - digressing. Now back to topic - of course it's ridiculous and I'm sure the ANA employees are embarrassed too as they stand there telling you to pee before you board. They should just be ignored.
Posted by: Jeremy | Oct 9, 2021 1:21:35 PM
Is it too much to ask that somebody proof read this text before publication? I would have guessed that a journalism grad who's worked for a major newspaper would know the difference between 'your' and 'you're', but hey, who's paying attention anyway, right?