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October 08, 2021

Airline tells you to use bathroom before boarding

You have to admit, airlines are pretty creative when they want to screw you.

What kind of monster travels with two bags?  Ding! That’ll be 30 bucks. Oh, you want to change your flight ‘cause your grandma’s sick?  Bang! 75 bucks. We’re sorry, it’s not our fault you’re a fat pig. You’ll need an extra seat.  Whack! Double your fare.

But for all of the airline industry’s inventive penny-pinching, the latest might be my favourite.

Japan’s All Nippon Airways (ANA) is apparently trying out a new initiative where airline staff will encourage passengers to use the bathroom before boarding the plane.

According to the Daily Mail, flight attendants will now stand by the airline’s boarding gate and ask each flier to “relieve themselves” in an apparent bid to cut down on carbon emissions (read: our profit margins on fuel aren’t big enough).

“ANA hopes the weight saved will lead to a five-tonne reduction in carbon emissions over the course of 30 days,” writes the newspaper.

While there’s no word on whether airline staff will actually stand next to passengers steroid-testing-style to make sure they pee (smell test anybody?), what’s sure is the policy was put in place at the start of October and could extend into a full-time procedure.

In case you’re wondering, the science has been done for us. The Daily Mail estimates, based on an average human bladder capacity, 150 passengers using the bathroom on an airplane would lead to an extra 63.7 kg of waste.

Is that worth an airline telling you to drain the tubes before getting on board? Well, you tell us.

By Jason Buckland, MSN Money

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Gordon PowersGordon Powers

A long-time fund company executive, Gordon Powers now heads up the Affinity Group, a financial services consulting firm. Gordon was a personal finance columnist for the Globe & Mail for many years, has taught retirement planning...

James HaversJames Havers

James is the senior editor of MSN Money living in Toronto. He has worked for the Nikkei Shimbun (Tokyo), canoe.ca, AOL.ca, Canadian Business and other publications. Havers turned to journalism after teaching overseas.

Jason BucklandJason Buckland

The modern-day MC Hammer of money, Jason can often be seen spending cash that isn’t his with the efficiency of a Wilt Chamberlain first date. After cutting his teeth as a reporter for the Toronto Sun, he joined the MSN Money team with...